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	<title>Stepfamily Zone</title>
	<atom:link href="http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/feed" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au</link>
	<description>Providing information and support to Australian Stepfamilies</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Sat, 13 Mar 2010 12:19:42 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>Stepchildren still are family, even after divorce</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/stepchildren-still-are-family-even-after-divorce</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/stepchildren-still-are-family-even-after-divorce#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 13 Mar 2010 12:19:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dealing with ex wives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Divorce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Searches]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stepchildren]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/stepchildren-still-are-family-even-after-divorce</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Q: I&#8217;ve been dating a man for a little over a month. 
His second marriage was the result of his getting the girl he was seeing pregnant. It lasted five very turbulent years. Their child is now 6 — and she also has three older children by another man. 
My problem is that my boyfriend [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Q: I&#8217;ve been dating a man for a little over a month. </p>
<p>His second marriage was the result of his getting the girl he was seeing pregnant. It lasted five very turbulent years. Their child is now 6 — and she also has three older children by another man. </p>
<p>My problem is that my boyfriend remains in contact with his three ex-stepchildren. In his words, &#8220;I divorced their mother, not them&#8221; and expects me to accept that those children are still his children for the rest of our lives. </p>
<p>His reasoning is that they&#8217;re his son&#8217;s siblings and they will always be a part of his life, as will his son&#8217;s mother. Is it fair to ask me to accept three former stepchildren? They really never were a family.</p>
<p>Read the answer&#8230;<a target="_blank" href="http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/homegarden/2011312314_exetiquette11.html">Home &amp; Garden | Stepchildren still are family, even after divorce | Seattle Times Newspaper</a></p>
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		<title>Should a stepmother be called Mum.</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/should-a-stepmother-be-called-mum</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/should-a-stepmother-be-called-mum#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 08 Mar 2010 02:01:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[In the news]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stepchildren]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stepfamily]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[StepfamilyProblems]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stepmothers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mummyd]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stepmum]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/should-a-stepmother-be-called-mum</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[* Argument over stepmum&#8217;s title goes to court
* Couple split when baby is four months old
* Mother argues dad &#8220;attempting to replace her&#8221;
AN Adelaide mother went to court to prevent her daughter from referring to her ex-husband&#8217;s new wife as &#8220;Mum&#8221; or &#8220;Mummy&#8221; or &#8220;my other Mummy&#8221;.
&#8216;The woman, who cannot be named, argued that her [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>* Argument over stepmum&#8217;s title goes to court<br />
* Couple split when baby is four months old<br />
* Mother argues dad &#8220;attempting to replace her&#8221;</p>
<p>AN Adelaide mother went to court to prevent her daughter from referring to her ex-husband&#8217;s new wife as &#8220;Mum&#8221; or &#8220;Mummy&#8221; or &#8220;my other Mummy&#8221;.</p>
<p>&#8216;The woman, who cannot be named, argued that her ex-husband was deliberately undermining her role as their child&#8217;s mother, by encouraging his new wife to answer to the terms &#8220;Mum&#8221; and &#8220;Mummy&#8221; and &#8220;Mummy-D&#8221; (D being the first letter of the stepmother&#8217;s first name.)<br />
<span id="more-2546"></span><br />
The battle has been going on for almost as long as the child has been able to speak. Her parents separated when she was four months old.</p>
<p>The Family Court case sets a precedent for Australia&#8217;s million-strong blended families, where arguments over who is to be called what are commonplace.</p>
<p>In the Adelaide case, the mother, known in court documents as Ms Klement, argued that the stepmother should not be permitted to refer to herself &#8220;as a motherly figure&#8221;.</p>
<p>By consent, her ex-husband agreed that his new wife should not be &#8220;Mum or &#8220;Mummy&#8221; but thought &#8220;Mummy-D&#8221; was fine.</p>
<p>The mother said the father was &#8220;attempting to replace her as the child&#8217;s mother by encouraging the child to call his new wife &#8220;Mum&#8221;. She said the new wife would sign the child&#8217;s school notes &#8220;Mum&#8221; and take the child to medical appointments, where she &#8220;presented herself as the mother&#8221;.</p>
<p>Ms Klement was &#8220;adamant that the child should only call her Mum&#8221; or any variation of &#8220;Mum&#8221;.</p>
<p>The stepmother rejects the accusation that she presents herself as the child&#8217;s mother.</p>
<p>The court declined to make an order that the child not refer to her stepmother as &#8220;Mummy-D&#8221; in part because the judge was concerned that such an order would lead to further litigation &#8220;where it would be up to the court to determine whether the father had breached the order in relation to encouraging the child to use the term Mummy-D&#8221;.</p>
<p>The court also expressed hope that the child would grow out of &#8220;Mummy-D&#8221; and begin calling her stepmother by her first name.</p>
<p>It was the only dispute between the separated couple.</p>
<p>All other matters, including where the child should live and go to school, and how much child support should be paid, had been settled in pre-court mediation, after more than six years of litigation.</p>
<p>The parents have a shared care arrangement.</p>
<p>News Source&#8230;<a href="http://www.news.com.au/national/mother-fights-to-stop-daughter-calling-her-stepmother-mum/story-e6frfkvr-1225838022305" target="_blank">Mother fights to stop daughter calling her stepmother &#8216;mum&#8217; | News.com.au</a></p>
<p><a href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind" target="_blank"><br />
</a><a href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind" target="_blank"></a></p>
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		<title>How to Be a Good Step Dad</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/how-to-be-a-good-step-dad</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/how-to-be-a-good-step-dad#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 06 Mar 2010 11:25:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stepchildren]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stepfathers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/how-to-be-a-good-step-dad</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[# Treat them like they&#8217;re your own. No child likes to be disrespected! Let alone a stepchild. They may act like you&#8217;re unwelcome, but that may be because they assume you think that you are their &#8216;replacement Dad&#8217;. Ignore the discouragement, and just treat them like your own kids.# Go easy on the discipline. They&#8217;ll [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p># Treat them like they&#8217;re your own. No child likes to be disrespected! Let alone a stepchild. They may act like you&#8217;re unwelcome, but that may be because they assume you think that you are their &#8216;replacement Dad&#8217;. Ignore the discouragement, and just treat them like your own kids.<br /># Go easy on the discipline. They&#8217;ll hate you for sure if you constantly nag, nag, nag about their grades, or nag, nag, nag about uncompleted chores. In their minds, no matter how awesome you are, they aren&#8217;t yours. It&#8217;s your job to teach them otherwise. They&#8217;ll never appreciate you if you mother them.<br /># Do amazing things. You have to think about them. They are your precious angels. When you&#8217;re out at the store, call their mother and ask if she or the kid(s) need anything. Anything at all. Or, better yet, want anything. If you can&#8217;t find what they want, call again and ask for a cheaper/more commonly found replacement. (WARNING: Guessing the replacement is an absolute no-no! What if you buy the cheapest of cheap brands and end up wasting your money?) </p>
<p>Read more&#8230;<a target="_blank" href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind/index.php?title=How_to_Be_a_Good_Step_Dad&amp;rcid=3698">How to Be a Good Step Dad &#8211; Wheretofindpedia</a>
<p><a target="_blank" href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind"><br /><img src="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/images/smallwheretofind.png" width="50" align="left" border="0" height="53" /></a><br /><a target="_blank" href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind"><br />Wheretofind</a></p>
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		<title>Blend a New Baby With an Older Step Child</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/blend-a-new-baby-with-an-older-step-child</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/blend-a-new-baby-with-an-older-step-child#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 04 Mar 2010 11:12:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stepchildren]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepchildren/blend-a-new-baby-with-an-older-step-child</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For a child who is used to getting all the attention, a new sibling can seem like competition. The older child may feel left out and pressured to grow up, which can create short-term and long-term problems for both siblings and parents.
As a parent, it might be challenging to give both children the amount and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>For a child who is used to getting all the attention, a new sibling can seem like competition. The older child may feel left out and pressured to grow up, which can create short-term and long-term problems for both siblings and parents.</p>
<p>As a parent, it might be challenging to give both children the amount and the type of attention they need. However, there are several ways to make all of your children feel valued.</p>
<p>Read more&#8230;<a target="_blank" href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind/index.php?title=Blend_a_New_Baby_With_an_Older_Step_Child">Blend a New Baby With an Older Step Child &#8211; Wheretofindpedia</a>
<p><a target="_blank" href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind"><br /><img src="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/images/smallwheretofind.png" width="50" align="left" border="0" height="53" /></a><br /><a target="_blank" href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind"><br />Wheretofind</a></p>
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		<title>Cook Cheap with a Crockpot</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/general-parenting/cook-cheap-with-a-crockpot</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/general-parenting/cook-cheap-with-a-crockpot#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Feb 2010 21:20:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[General Parenting]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/general-parenting/cook-cheap-with-a-crockpot</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One of the best tools you can possibly have in your kitchen is the crockpot or slow cooker. Forget diamonds, this sucker is woman&#8217;s best friend. You can cook cheap meats in your slow cooker and they will magically come out soft and falling off the bone! Beans turn into a wonder dish in the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>One of the best tools you can possibly have in your kitchen is the crockpot or slow cooker. Forget diamonds, this sucker is woman&#8217;s best friend. You can cook cheap meats in your slow cooker and they will magically come out soft and falling off the bone! Beans turn into a wonder dish in the slow cooker and everything has more flavor because its stewed in tasty juices for hours.<br />
<span id="more-2540"></span><br />
While slow cookers are most renowned as time savers, they are really very good for helping the average family lower their food budget, too. Instead of buying expensive cuts of meat, you can easily cook cheap ones that would ordinarily be too tough to deal with. Ribs, for example, can be very tough on occasion, but if you pop them in the slow cooker, you&#8217;ll have melt in your mouth ribs by evening.</p>
<p>Add to this the fact that anything you add to the slow cooker or crockpot disperses its flavor slowly throughout the cooking time and you have a great way to stay on budget.</p>
<p>Vegetarian dishes tend to be cheaper than meat ones, so you might want to try cooking a bean stew or lentils in your crockpot for cheaper meals. With the addition of a few vegetables, you&#8217;ve got a tasty dish that can be served over rice. If you want to make pasta sauce, this can be very easily done, you just need to slow cook the tomatoes and onions with herbs added in the last hour. Freeze the extra for later use and you have a huge savings over those pre-made sauces.</p>
<p>Many dishes cost just a dollar or two when made from scratch, so skip the prepared items and use your slow cooker to cook cheap cuts of meat, vegetables, soups and stews, or even prepare your own chicken stock by cooking your chicken carcass for 24 hours or so in water. Things that would normally take a long time and require a lot of attention are now able to cook overnight or during the day while you are out and about and busy with other things.</p>
<p>Cook cheap meals in your slow cooker and your family will eat well for next to nothing. You can stock up the next time there&#8217;s a sale on tough bits of meat and just pop them into the crockpot for 10 hours to soften them up . . . you won&#8217;t regret having a crockpot.</p>
<p>About the Author</p>
<p>Looking to <a href="http://thegourmetmama.com/?s=slow+cooker&amp;search=">cook cheap for your family</a>? At TheGourmetMama.com, you&#8217;ll find great, easy recipes to impress everyone in the family.</p>
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		<title>Step Parenting Course Bathurst 25th March 2009</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepfamily-support/stepparenting-courses/new-south-wales/step-parenting-course-bathurst-25th-march-2009</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepfamily-support/stepparenting-courses/new-south-wales/step-parenting-course-bathurst-25th-march-2009#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 11 Feb 2010 05:40:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New South Wales]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepfamily-support/stepparenting-courses/new-south-wales/step-parenting-course-bathurst-25th-march-2009</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This course looks at stages of becoming a step family and the difficulties that can be expected. It aims to normalise the process and to help people move forward as well as giving participants a chance to share their experiences.
Read more&#8230;New South Wales — Relationships Australia
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This course looks at stages of becoming a step family and the difficulties that can be expected. It aims to normalise the process and to help people move forward as well as giving participants a chance to share their experiences.</p>
<p>Read more&#8230;<a href="http://www.relationships.com.au/courses/life_relationship_courses/new-south-wales/course_view?type=support&amp;id=3012">New South Wales — Relationships Australia</a></p>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Books on dealing with step daughters</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepmothers/books-on-dealing-with-step-daughters</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepmothers/books-on-dealing-with-step-daughters#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Feb 2010 00:58:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stepmothers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepmothers/books-on-dealing-with-step-daughters</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Stepmothers and Stepdaughters: Relationships of Chance, Friendships for a Lifetime
Click here to read more
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Stepmothers and Stepdaughters: Relationships of Chance, Friendships for a Lifetime</p>
<p><a href="http://www.stepfamily.asn.au/content/view/949/214/" target="_blank">Click here to read more</a></p>
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		<title>Definition of Joint Custody</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/general-parenting/definition-of-joint-custody</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/general-parenting/definition-of-joint-custody#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Feb 2010 21:01:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[General Parenting]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/general-parenting/definition-of-joint-custody</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Joint custody is a court order whereby custody of a child is awarded to both parties. In joint custody both parents are &#8220;custodial parents&#8221; and neither parent is a non-custodial parent; or, in other words, the child has two custodial parents.
Read more
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Joint custody is a court order whereby custody of a child is awarded to both parties. In joint custody both parents are &#8220;custodial parents&#8221; and neither parent is a non-custodial parent; or, in other words, the child has two custodial parents.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind/index.php?title=Joint_Custody_-_Definition">Read more</a></p>
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		<title>How to Tell Children You Are Remarrying</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/how-to-tell-children-you-are-remarrying</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/how-to-tell-children-you-are-remarrying#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Feb 2010 20:26:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stepfamily]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/how-to-tell-children-you-are-remarrying</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Congratulations, you&#8217;re engaged, again. A great but emotional time for everyone. But how will you tell your children? Remember children are more emotionally fragile than adults.
Steps
1. Sit them down. Bring them into the main family room and sit across from them with your partner.
2. Be sensitive. If you only have one child then no matter [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Congratulations, you&#8217;re engaged, again. A great but emotional time for everyone. But how will you tell your children? Remember children are more emotionally fragile than adults.</p>
<p><strong>Steps</strong></p>
<p>1. Sit them down. Bring them into the main family room and sit across from them with your partner.<br />
2. Be sensitive. If you only have one child then no matter how old they are, hold their hands, show affection. If you have two or more children then just speak in a sweet tone.<br />
3. Ask how they feel. If your child/children see your partner as a parent then you should skip this step as it may make things worse. If they do not see your partner as a parent then ask them how they feel about them.<br />
4. Tell them how you feel. Tell them that you love your partner but you will always love them just as much,<br />
5. Break the news. Tell them you are remarrying.</p>
<p><a href="http://goodparentingmagazine.com/wheretofind/index.php?title=How_to_Tell_Children_You_Are_Remarrying">How to Tell Children You Are Remarrying</a></p>
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		<title>Parents&#8217; Rights Vs Children&#8217;s Needs</title>
		<link>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepfamily-forums/parents-rights-vs-childrens-needs</link>
		<comments>http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepfamily-forums/parents-rights-vs-childrens-needs#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Feb 2010 20:21:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Faulkner</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stepfamily Forums]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stepfamilyzone.com.au/stepfamily/stepfamily-forums/parents-rights-vs-childrens-needs</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Lawyers back this up: Around 62 percent of them believe the laws favour parents’ rights over children’s needs.
Do you think that parents&#8217; rights should outweigh children&#8217;s needs (unless in cases of proven abuse/violence)? I feel that parent&#8217;s should have rights to their children unless we are somehow not living in a free society.
I can see [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Lawyers back this up: Around 62 percent of them believe the laws favour parents’ rights over children’s needs.<br />
Do you think that parents&#8217; rights should outweigh children&#8217;s needs (unless in cases of proven abuse/violence)? I feel that parent&#8217;s should have rights to their children unless we are somehow not living in a free society.</p>
<p>I can see that children&#8217;s needs are important but I believe that parent&#8217;s rights to a child they brought into the world should be also. As long as their child&#8217;s basic needs are being met and they are not coming to any harm I believe that parent&#8217;s rights should be paramount to the decisions of custody.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.stepfamilyzone.com.au/forums/showthread.php?t=7963&amp;goto=newpost">View Original Article</a></p>
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